Friday the 13th Part III (3-D DVD)

So last night I watched this DVD. I had high hopes as this is one of the "Friday the 13th" installments where Jason still acts somewhat like a human being (running after people, etc...). I've also been excited by the resurgence of 3-D in mainstream films as of late. So here are some thoughts on this flick.

1) That Shelly motherfucker is a complete turd. He is like a grown-up version of Chunk from "The Goonies", only he is sad and pathetic and never did get laid (I'm sure that even Chunk has by now!). He is also possibly the most self-loathing character in all of film history. This guy could talk his way out of a prison rape. However, we all have to credit Shelly with introducing Jason to the iconic hockey mask.

2) Why does that douchebag insist on walking on his hands? It wasn't cool then and isn't now. I was actually happy to see his ass get waxed by Jason.

3) Have you ever seen such pussy bikers? Just asking.

4) Why is there a "lady in the lake?" I know it didn't really happen, but it just seemed like a cheap scare at the end of the film.

5) Most of the 3-D effects on the DVD version consist of rather mundane things like a yo-yo being dangled in front of your face. I did, however, like the fact that I felt as though an eyeball was dropped on my carpet.

Bottom line: This is obviously an essential for any die-hard "Friday the 13th" fan, but you won't miss much if you are a run-of-the-mill horror aficianado. Special points for Jason's extra-creepy unmasked scenes.